Saturday, February 23, 2008
I'm still here. I know I haven't been posting much lately. I know I haven't been visiting your blogs lately. It's not you-it's me. I started to realize a couple of things. One-I'm spending more time online than in the studio. Art brings me joy-technology...not so much. Although I watch a lot less TV than I used to, I've replaced it with another distraction-being online. Writing my blog, reading blogs, being in forums. So, I'm cutting back.
Now, for the other reason I've disappeared. I've always looked to others to validate myself and my work-even my non-artistic work. It's something I've struggled with my whole life. Like a child, I always feel like I'm running up to someone and saying "look what I made!" and then waiting for them to say it's very nice. Only then can I feel proud of my accomplishment. And my blog is feeding that side of me. My joy for my artwork is becoming dependent on blog comments and Etsy sales. And that's not what I should be here for. I'm here to entertain and inspire you. My blog shouldn't just be a vehicle to "fish" for compliments. It's a place to connect and share, with no expectations. I do know that your comments are meant to be supportive and I love you all for that. The problem is I'm depending on them like an addict.
I need to spend more time working on my art. I need to love it because I love it, not because other people love it or want to buy it. I need to take the time to enjoy the process, rather than rushing to get it done so that I can post it to my blog. I'll still blog, just not as often, so please add me to your RSS Feed and, when I've added an entry, you will know. You will know that the entry will be about sharing, not about asking. You will know I'm happy and having fun and loving my art because it's mine, not because someone else says it's good.