Friday, January 6, 2012

On Being an Adult

The surf in Southern California is supposed to be quite large today and tomorrow.  I love to watch the waves and, since I only live about 15 minutes from the beach, I was planning to go sit on a cliff overlooking the water and watch the water for a bit today.  But today has dawned and I'm thinking about all the other things I should be doing: Working on getting ready for Craft & Hobby trade show, working on some projects, cleaning my house, getting my taxes ready.  A million excuses for not taking an hour or two from my day to do something just for me.  I'm making deals with myself as we speak, "You can go AFTER you get the deposits entered in the computer." When, in reality, I know that I'll just keep working and then it will be time to pick my daughter up from school, and I'll not have gone to the beach at all.

What happened to the adulthood I always imagined as a child?  I used to dream of being a "grown-up".  I was sure I would go to bed when I wanted, I would eat what and when I wanted (like raw cookie dough for dinner), I would play instead of cleaning my room.  I now have the freedom to do all those things I dreamed of, yet I'm stricter with myself than my mother ever was. 

My new year's resolution this year to take better care of myself.  Not just diet and exercise, but take time for me.  Today, while I was journaling about this whole adult concept, I realized it would be easy to take care of myself if I would just be the grown-up I dreamed I would be.  You know, a seven-year old's-version of a grown-up.  How about you?  What did you imagine adulthood was going to be like?  Have you let yourself down on those dreams?  Please tell me, but don't expect me to answer back anytime soon.  I'm going to the beach.